- Me: *Doesn't party*
- Me: *Doesn't drink*
- Me: *Doesn't sleep around*
- Me: *Doesn't get knocked up*
- Me: *Stays up past 1 AM; Maybe goes downstairs to make a sandwich or something*
- Parents: WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU WHY ARE YOU UP SO LATE DID WE TEACH YOU NOTHING WHERE DID WE GO WRONG YOU'VE WOKEN UP THE WHOLE HOUSE YOU HIDEOUS DEVIL CHILD YOU'RE DESTROYING THIS FAMILY.
10 years from now people are gonna ask me how my teenage years went and I will just start crying
- me: does one sit-up
- me: checks for abs
- what I said: omg this is going to be the best summer ever!!1
- what happened: well there's always next year
what happens at olive garden when theyre grating the cheese and you don’t say “when”
the waiter gets more and more concerned as the cheese starts piling up and you remain silent. they eventually plead with you to stop this madness and just say when, but you hold firm. olive garden fills with cheese, killing everyone in the building as cheese begins to pour out into the street. the world floods with cheese. all is cheese.